RIP Father, My Personal Experience in Homelessness and Addiction

4 years ago my father passed away on Dec 27th. He was homeless and addicted to alcohol. Many people can be very cruel to the homeless, calling them drug addicts, bums and worse. To me he was my father and even though we were not in contact and weren’t close due to a lot of issues from the past, he was still my father and I loved him.

About a week after I learned about my father’s death my mother and me were in a restaurant and overheard a family talking about the “bums” they saw on the way to dinner. It was the saddest thing to hear them talking to their kids as if the homeless people in our town are worthless. It’s something you don’t forget.

6 months before he died he called me. It had been at least 15 years since I talked to him and I told him I couldn’t have a relationship with him if he was still drinking. 6 months later he died…

…..a preventable death.

He had gotten into a fight earlier. He was already drunk and fell into the river; the coldest river in Oregon. He died of hypothermia after having fallen into the water.

He was a person and he had feelings. He had family that loved him and wanted him to get help but the alcohol had too much control over him and he refused treatment.

I can’t say he would have become a better person had he stopped drinking. There is really no way to know that because it never happened. He had been drinking since he was in his teens and had underlying issues that were a trigger for drinking himself into death.

…But he had family who loved him

and they would have done anything to help him get better. But it didn’t matter because he was sic.

To anyone who believes that a homeless person is just a worthless waste of space. PLEASE think twice. That homeless man might have lost everything. That women might be running from an abusive situation and didn’t have anywhere to go. That teen you see on the street corner might be addicted to drugs, but think about where he came from and how he might have gotten into the situation.  Have COMPASSION and EMPATHY, teach your kids COMPASSION and EMPATHY.

But most of all, if I am not able to change your mind about your feelings towards the homeless, at least have the courtesy of not telling the person next to you (a complete stranger) how you “really” feel, because you do not know where she might have come from. You do not know that her father was a “bum”, addicted to alcohol and drugs and died in the river after having fallen of a ledge.

Please think twice before talking openly in an open place about those “bums” you saw on the street corner. The person in the booth next to you might have just lost a loved one, who was homeless, to a tragic accident.